Every once in a while, in the middle of an ordinary life when you think you’re finally on top of your game, the doctor throws you a curve ball and tells you he needs to operate in 5 days.
And that you’ll be down for 6 weeks.
Ummmmmmmm. It’s finally springtime and I NEEED to do some serious yardwork.
Well, I was expecting the surgery. And honestly I was thinking of asking for it. I had it all planned out what to say to him. Like…. “Come on. I have good insurance. Let’s do it now.” Or “I’m not leaving here until you agree to just taking it all out.” But he beat me to the punch.
But because it was necessary. NOW.
And still. I was shocked and speechless.
I have had my fair share of issues over the years but this last little while has been awful and I knew that I was eventually going to be needing surgery.
I’m a week out of surgery now and I feel crappy. I really thought I’d bounce back faster than this and I’ve been seriously irritated that I really have had to spend so much time in bed feeling like crap on crackers.
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I’m still young….. or am I?
I mean, I realize I have 2 teenagers, 1 being an adult teenager! He graduates in 2 months! What? I know that my child bearing years are over for sure.
Okay. Well I just never had thought about it. I’ve kinda had these parts my whole life. I mean, I was born with them. Which must mean I’m supposed to have them for life, right?
I remember that awful moment in elementary when they bring out the granny panties with an already attached big old pad and give you the “talk” about how to deal with your female reproduction parts you were born with. And the fear that’s put in place about what’s yet to come. Oh my. I still remember being so worried about the blood bath that was in my future. It all seems so dramatic and life threatening at that age.
As women, we just know that this is our life. We deal with it.
And now I don’t have to anymore. That part, I’m not complaining.
Okay… but really. I am so very glad to have it over and done with and I’m a week into the healing process. And I’m so grateful for my amazing doctor and his staff and their care they showed for me. I had a couple setbacks and am so glad I had such talented and caring people around me to make sure I was okay.
10 things I have realized thru this process:
1. I can do hard things.
2. I was blessed to carry 2 beautiful healthy babies in my womb. And so very grateful to have been able to do so. So many women never get that chance.
3. I have an amazing support system.
4. I am hard on myself. When I’m forced to sit down and do nothing, I realize how much I actually do.
5. It kills me to watch my daughter and husband cook dinner and do the dishes and run to the store and run all the errands. They work and school all day. I’m home. That’s hardly fair.
6. I knew I was going to die to be outside in the yard so I planted tulips, hyacinths and daffodils that I bought for $1 each at Walmart in my pretty little indoor pots. They’re beautiful and all starting to bloom. So glad I thought to bring spring in the home so I could enjoy it.
7. I think my little Bella has earned her Service Dog cape. She is too smart for her own good and she has watched over me super close. She’s always walking in front of me while looking back over her shoulder making sure I’m okay. And Daizee, she is just my snugglebug. Bella has a way of making me giggle…
8. I don’t have a care in the world to who doesn’t love me because there are plenty of people that do.
9. My lack of appetite has helped me kick my soda pop habit.
10. I will never ever be a drug addict. Oh how I hate the way they make me feel. Pray I never have to do Benadryl thru the IV again. Not only does it burn like hell and leave your arm aching for days, but those planes bombing the hospital with flying cartoon foxes were brutal.
Thanks for being a part of my journey.